Into a gray sky morning
Vertical Horizon. (2001). Best I Ever Had (Grey Sky Morning).
My first memory of listening to this song is when I (illegally) tuning in to Hitz.fm shortly after midnight by using a small portable radio I bought at a shop and brought (more like smuggled) into the hostel (of course, illegally).
I was 14 and a huge rebel against the rule, though in a petty way of course, like smuggling illegal stuff (re: manga, radio lol) but I was never caught red-handed during the whole 5 years I'm there, to my own amusement, though I know I'm under the prefects watch list.
Back to the song, I had no idea whose song it was, much less the title, but I remember sneaking in the dorm (it's past the curfew and sleeping time after all) and wrote down some of the lyric before tuning in for the night. When I woke up the next day (more like the morning later) I hardly remember how the song goes, though I just have the vaguest feeling to search for it again.
Fast forward a couple of years later when I'm more familiar with the internet and able to expand my usage of it instead of just chess with people via Yahoo!Games when I found back the old notebook filled with scribbles, and the lyric strike up a chord in me.
I had no idea what it was, since there's just like, 2 lines or something (But it's not so bad/You're only the best I ever had) but I'm pretty sure it was lyrics so Google it up, found the title and band, and listen to it via Pandora (I must be such a noob for I'm not sure why I didn't just use Youtube back then OTL).
Needless to say, I was so delighted I re-discover the song, I make it a point to always have it in my collection, whenever I happen to lose all the data in the laptop and have to rebuild it again time after time.
Alas.
I may not be a huge fan of the band (the only other song of them that I know is You're a God, and that's because I remember watching the music video one time on MTV) but Best I Ever Had remain a song that I hold dear and close, for even now, all the years later and I am always taken back to that night of radio-smuggling, the small device's wire hidden under my shirt, wary of people passing by to avoid being caught and just staring up the sky.
I don't have much memory of being a high school student, (for some reason it gets fuzzy during that period of time as opposed to my elementary school period -weird I know) but the fact that I do have one song (aside from Linkin Park) that can be associated with a (sorta) special moment of being there (albeit whilst breaking the rules) makes me happy, somehow.
And Best I Ever Had might just speaks true to its title; as it's a song that always and still makes me feel a tad nostalgic whenever it shows up in my playlist.
I may not be a good student, and I may have more bad memories than good ones when I think of my high school times and being a teenager as a whole, but perhaps there's certain things from that time that can be the best things I ever had and come to understand as I get older.
Like, how if it's possible, I would like to apologize to a couple of people for my immaturity back then when I'll definitely won't do so even if a gun is point at my head back when I was in my teens.
(If by off chance there's any of my high school mates/classmates/seniors/juniors that by some miracle somehow ever got to read this, please know that I'm sorry for being such a difficult teenager and had there's any old debt that I don't know off, feel free to contact me. Though I do apologize in advance if I don't recognize you, my memory is the worst when it comes to remembering people and names, really.)
And maybe, just maybe, as I slowly grow as a person myself, it is enough, like this.
Till then.
<(_ _)>
~the somewhat-remorseful-and-nostalgic Heiji
Music of the Day: Daughter - Youth
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